The trains today were running on time or close to schedule, but the people were running out of their minds and close to mental. Penn Station was a zoo today.
Who am I kidding? That place is always a zoo. It’s just an absolute mess, but today it felt a little extra manic, as it always does on the day before a holiday weekend. Everybody’s got to get home and everybody is just a little bit more important than everybody else so if you get in anybody’s way, you’re going to have a problem.
“Keep Christ in Christmas!” she exclaimed as she knocked over the stroller.
That’s a joke, but it’s not very far off. Do you want to see what happens when the track the train is going to be on is announced? I should have taken a video. Just imagine everybody smushed together vibrating like little gas particles. It’s like a human cloud trying to push it’s way through a door.
See all those people? See that tiny door? Yes, you better believe that the crux of that bottleneck is TIGHT like a tiger, and you better have tiger blood coursing through your veins if you want to make it down those steps alive. But if you do, there might just be a little treat waiting for you on your seat.
So you finally make it down the stairs and every single car is packed to the gills. It’s like a subway, but it’s not, because you’re not going to be on this train for ten minutes. You’re looking at over an hour of travel, so you better find a seat. Like a scene out of a movie, you scurry down the platform ducking your head down so you can see if there’s any good places to sit. You don’t want to sit next to that guy. Nope, forget him too. God forbid you sit in the little area where the seats face each other, then you have to look at people, and we all know that commuters hate to interact. Oops, that car is full of kids. That car is packed too.
Aaaaaahhhhh here we go, this car has some good availability. Then like a diamond in the rough, you see the top of a seat poking out and no head resting on it! And there’s a petite woman sitting in the adjacent seat so you won’t be crushed by Sammy The Bull who MUST write his brother a letter on the computer using Microsoft Word (Why doesn’t he just use a type writer?)
As you draw nearer you see somebody approaching from the opposite end. Oh no! Wait, you’re saved. Somebody gets up to take their jacket off and the seat swiper gets blocked. Just as you get to the seat that’s all you’ve been dreaming about since you approached the train, you see a little something on the seat. What is that?
Is that a 5 spot sticking out of that sticker? Well, yes it is. It looks like today really is your lucky day. Not only did you find a seat on one of the busiest travel days of the year, but there’s money in it? Who does that happen to? You, that’s who. You deserve it. Now enjoy your ride home and try not to lose your mind when you realize you bought an off-peak ticket and the step up fee is $5 okay? Merry Christmas!!